I don't care whatcha think, as long as it's about me.

The rest of us can find happiness in misery.
Oh how I love me some Fall Out Boy. Sigh.
I'm not sure exactly why, but I know I've been out of my funk guys, and I'm sorry. It's weird, started Saturday..? And hasn't exactly stopped. Weird mood swings, and honest, I'm sick of it. I just want to be happy dammit!
I think there are a couple of major points though, that are bringing me down:

1. All this talk about wanting to leave Show Low and never come back. Yay college, yay new lives, I get the gist. I'm so extremely happy for every single one of you, I just hate the fact that you feel so tied down and want to leave. I don't want to be the one to hold you back, I'm just going to miss you. Shay says at least every other day that there are only four months left, and every single time I hear it, a piece of me breaks. Just small pieces, but once you break enough of them, a whole chunk breaks away. I'm not holding you back, I just wish you knew what leaving is going to do to me. Not just Shay though... all of you. It's not that I don't want you to leave, it's that I love you too much to let you go.
It was probably a realll bad idea to become such good friends with Seniors and Juniors. Suck.

2. All the stress of school is kind of taking it's toll, too. I'm so worked up about getting good grades it's all I think about. "I have to study, I have to study, I have to study." I almost wish it came easily to me, but working for it is nice.. just hard. I need some chill time.

3. I think I need some me time? Or.. some me-and-my-best-friend-hanging-out-laughing time. Quite possibly that's the case. I want to be people friendly... once I'm happy with people again. That's the best I can explain it.


Right now
I am feeling a bit burned out, but still there.

Right now
I am thinking about today.

Right now
I am really wishing I could express my thoughts.

Right now
I am looking forward for the weekend.

Right now
I am wanting to go read my book.

Right now
I want to know what’s wrong with me today...



Food for thought
“There is one thing I have to tell you, just one thing you need to remember always. You are my best friend. You have been that way for a while now and in my heart you always will be. That’s it.”

“I believe in pink, I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.”


Just give me some time. I'll get there.

Babyy

She's precious. :] Love it.

WECOME!

To the world, baby sister.
"hello babies. welcome to earth. it’s hot in the summer and cold in the winter. it’s round wet and crowded. outside, babies, you’ve got about 100 years and there’s only one rule that i know of, babies. god damn, you’ve got to be kind."

Spencer Patrice Hancock, one of the most beautiful things ever.
She's precious, gorgeous, and perfect.
I'll have pictures soon, I'm so excited.
She'll come home Friday and right now is at the hospital with my momma.
I love her already, I can't wait to see what she becomes<3

I wish I wish, upon a fish?

Maybe, I should look at things from a different perspective.
Maybe I should sit down and think about how things are.
Don't get me wrong, I'm the happiest I've been in.. well.. a really long time.
But, honestly, I feel like I should feel bad for doing some things I've done.
I just with I could go back and fix what I did, or approach the situation better now that I know the outcome, because I kills me to hurt people, especially the ones that matter.
So, if you're reading this, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I'm just to chicken to say it to your face.

Anyway. It was a good day. Bio and lunch are probably the highlights of everyday, and hearing Steph rant and yell at people on the road. That's great.

This, right here, made me smile so big:

So, I come to an end with not much to say. Thank you, I'm sorry, and I love each and every one of you.

Food for thought: You and I were alive for a great moment in history.

In your whole life, nobody has ever abused you more than you have abused yourself. And the limit of your self-abuse is exactly the limit of abuse that you will tolerate from someone else.

The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable.
- Thanks to http://finallyseeing.tumblr.com/

Barack.

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America — they will be met. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist. To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to the suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world’s resources without regard to effect.

Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek, for the world has changed, and we must change with it.
-Barack Obama, our president.

Yes. It is a good heart.

You can love all you can. You can do what you can. You can care all you can. But, in the end, who you end up hurting isn't something you can choose. You can't save everyone, someone is going to get hurt, no matter how much you don't want them to. But, you can't think of everyone else all of the time. Sometimes, you just have to think about what's best for you, how you can make your life better. And, if you save someone else from hurting, well, you've done the best you can do.

Things that have saved me within the last week:
-Being close with my best friend. I love her.
-Good classes. I love them.
-The love of learning? :] Ohh, it's so nice to understand what I'm learning. I love it.
-Them, my friends. Everything they do makes me better.
-Feeling refreshed. Vegetarian, here I come. :p
-Doing well in Bio. I'm passing, I think? It's a wonderful class.
-Good relationships. Even though some are bad, I'm not worrying. Everything will be okay.
-Getting told I'm beautiful. I love compliments?
-Clothes. What more can I say? :]


I can say being sick is NOT on that list, it's suckkeeedd.
This week has been alright though. I'm really enjoying this semester so far. I think it's going to turn out well. :]
We'll see hoe it goes next week.

New.

Starting over, it's a new year. It's weird, because it doesn't seem any different yet, everything is. Everything is new, fresh, a new beginning. Huh.
I feel kind of bad, I had a chance to blog before the new year happened, but I didn't think about it until I read Cass's blog. I feel bad because I won't get a chance to have my say in 2008. It's funky, I know, and not a big deal. I was just thinking about it.
This New Year's was different, I didn't spend it with Heather, or Blake, or Shay. It was weirdest without Shay.
Also, as a tradition, I usually make New Years Resolutions, but this year I didn't.
That really bugs me. So, before the official first day of the new year is over, I'll make some.
The new Kara.:
Forgive easier.
Be nicer.
Be happier.
Go veg for awhile.
Tell the truth all of the time, unless it's seriously going to hurt someone.
Keep the drama out, and the happy in.
Keep "best friends"?
Have a good year, throughout everything.



Anyway, I spent the last minutes of 2008 in a good place, with good people, and ended on a good note.
:] I loved it.


'May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you’re wonderful, and don’t forget to make some art — write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.'